The Real Housewives of Sydney
Tuesday, stream on Binge
Do you love long lunches, fancy houses, frozen faces and incredibly low-stakes drama between complete strangers? Well then rejoice! Because the latest instalment of The Real Housewives franchise is here and we are heading to the Emerald City. Yes, the winner is … Sydney!
If you caught the short-lived first season of this series back in 2019, you will recognise two of the “housewives”, Krissy Marsh and Nicole O’Neil. The rest of the crew is all new. Who are they? Apparently, some of them are “very famous”. We’ll take their word for it.
In the grand tradition of Real Housewives everywhere, episode one consists of a lot of establishing exactly how rich these women are by taking tours of their fancy houses. Unfortunately, there is little of the bombastic bling bling of their American counterparts, everything is cream and beige with a smattering of off-white. Still, Sydney real estate, amirite?
We do get a little more outrageous with the Housewives themselves, who are coming together as a group for the first time at a luncheon organised by Terry, who, as everyone keeps saying, is: “saaah fun”.
For some reason, all the housewives have to walk through a park (?) to reach the restaurant where the lunch is being held, which gives us an excellent opportunity to see their outfits. After all, that’s what we’re watching for.
At the lunch, lines are drawn between the recently divorced ring-in from Byron Bay, Caroline Gaultier, and Queen of the Eastern Suburbs, Marsh, over something the latter allegedly said to the former at some long forgotten get-together.
Fun, fluffy and with lots of producer-led drama, the Housewives are all still settling into their roles as reality TV show stars at this point, but by the looks of it, they are up for anything. Will we be telling everyone we’re watching this? No. Will we actually be watching it? Almost certainly yes.
Take 5 with Zan Rowe
Tuesday, 8pm, ABC
Music fans of a certain vintage will be familiar with Zan Rowe from her work on Triple J and Double J. This new show is basically a radio show — now with pictures! Rowe meets with a famous musician, with the first episode featuring Noel Gallagher, who takes us through their five favourite songs. It’s hardly a groundbreaking premise and in truth, it works better on radio.
Monday, 7:30pm, Seven and 7Plus
The extreme reality show relocates to the Jordan desert in its fourth season. The recruits, which consist of an eclectic line-up of actors, sports people and the famous for being famous, are put through their paces to see who will break and who will battle through. The first episode sees the focus on convicted drug smuggler Cassie Sainsbury who tells the cameras she is there to prove she is more than just “cocaine Cassie”. Compelling telly.
Mother and Son
Wednesday, 8:30pm, ABC
The finale of this gentle comedy sees Arthur have some reservations about Maggie’s wild mate, Heather, with the two of them causing havoc at Tony and Maya’s new restaurant. We will miss these crazy kids, hopefully they are back soon.
Thursday, 12am, SBS
A French crime drama set on the ski slopes with a ski-champion-turned-cop teaming up with a local disillusioned gendarme to solve a murder? Oui! s’il vous plait. The trailers for this six-part series promise epic scenery and lots of glamorous French apres ski all set against a backdrop of murder. Can’t wait.